Social (studies) Isolation

No vinyl today - mostly because of a migraine that's making my right eyeball feel like it's about to explode. I think it's the pressure from all the rain we're getting but it could also be anxiety fuelled insomnia related. My mental health has always fluctuate between totally fine and no problems to almost bad enough that I might mention it to my family doctor. So it's manageable and I am lucky - it doesn't make it any easier to get to sleep. I also do myself no favours by reading articles about a potential second, more lethal wave hitting in September. It's been a minute since I last posted. So I wanted to talk about last Thursday today... I went to school. I had to do some recordings for our grad events and that required me to be in the building. IT WAS THE BEST. I walked into my classroom and instantly felt like myself again. I felt intelligent, personable, funny - like all the best parts of me were just there waiting. I got to visit (distantly)...

So most of my vinyl, it turns out, is comprised of bands I have seen at Folk Fest. This means that I have had a hard time putting anything on in the morning because anything that transports me to an island in the city in the sunshine just makes me sad. But I've decided the way to move beyond the canceling of my FAVOURITE PART OF THE ENITRE YEAR is to maybe listen to some of that music again and enjoy it in other ways. So this morning is The Cat Empire. An upbeat jazzy, latin horn-ish, contemporary band out of Australia. They are so good. I've seen them a couple of times at the festival and they never fail to get the whole crowd up dancing. I'm obviously still struggling to cope with the many disappointments that pile up. I did have a very big breakthrough in my understandings of myself this weekend though - on that end. I realized that I live in the future. I plan and imagine and plan some more. I build things up in a way that makes it hard for the actual event to meet ...

I just really enjoy drag queens, ok?  I binge watched all of RuPaul’s Drag Race during my maternity leave and then became fascinated by drag culture. So, as one does, I did a deep dive into the history of the ball scene in New York and did everything I could to learn about the authentic experiences of trans women of colour and their community and allies - especially in the 80s and 90s during the AIDS crisis. I watched Pose, Paris is Burning, The Queen, WIG, all of it. And now I listen to the country music album of a Barbie inspired drag queen. I think about this history a lot right now, the AIDS part of it especially. I grew up in the AIDS crisis. It was very much something I was aware of as a child but not something I truly understood until I looked into it as an adult. The fear and loss is immeasurable. The parts that I have the hardest time even thinking about are the endless funerals and all the people (but especially gay men and trans women) dying alone in hospitals because of...

No time for vinyl this morning. I put on Trixie Mattel’s Barbara album for the short commute to drop the baby off with my parents for the day. I don’t usually listen to the albums made by the Drag Queen’s from RuPaul’s Drag Race - but Trixie’s music is actually very good.  Wednesday is always a good day for getting work done. Full day childcare makes everything easier. We know that she is taken care of and having fun and also have the space and time to focus on work solely. Almost. Today went really well until the meal kit delivery arrived and the door bell rang in the middle of class. The dog started barking and my husband had to come down to deal with all of the chaos while I tried to explain the most interesting takeaways from Germany’s response to the pandemic. Just a reminder that even the easiest days working from home are still a challenge.  The Minister of Education announced today that in person classes will officially be cancelled for the remainder of this school yea...

Frank Turner speaks to my soul. His music has been with me since I first discovered him (obviously) on a side stage at Folk Fest. He's been all over Europe with me, to University in Lethbridge, countless road trips all over western Canada and the North Western States, long commutes to work, painting a new house - everywhere. I needed a few days away from this. I think the blog was reinforcing monotony in a dangerous way. Just a really clear reminder that I'm not doing much as I struggled to think of something to write about at the end of each work day. Things have changed though! I'm still working from home, we are still social distancing and isolating to various degrees. The province is starting the initial phases of a re-opening though. As I write this, people who just last week were working from home are commuting back at the end of the day. I haven't decided how I feel about this yet. Re-opening is full of hope that we can return to a not yet normal, but mor...

I've discovered a new podcast called Solve so that's what I listened to as I got my day started today. It's a murder mystery podcast that you solve while listening to the story. I'm hooked. I'm also usually wrong about who the killer is, surprising given my affinity for true crime usually. I was right, some sunshine and fresh air was exactly what I needed. I'm in a better frame of mind right now. Busy with checklists for work and project dreams for improving our home. We also got a new vacuum, I am uncomfortable with how exciting this is for me. Teaching has also been good this week, which has helped me to be a bit more positive. I had a class this morning where kids unmuted themselves to share what they have been learning and have some discourse. It was SO GOOD. It felt like real teaching actually having them engage with me and with each other. My other classes haven't been so keen on this but I'm hopeful that they'll also participate in a b...

AWOLNATION has this way of being simultaneously angst ridden and uplifting. Perfect for the coming of spring and a global pandemic. I'm feeling a lot of ways right now. Part of me is still really happy with this extra time at home. I feel like I know my husband again, we have time to talk about things that aren't related to work and we get to spend entire days together. Albeit, on different floors of the house, but still that's much better than different parts of the city. I have more time to exercise, get fresh air and walk the dog, play in the backyard. The best part is still having more time with my daughter. Part of me is lonely and bored. I miss seeing friends and family in person. I miss having busy weekends where we can't possibly fit all of the plans in. I miss going to the mall, hockey and lacrosse games, my work(!!!). I miss playing soccer. This isn't to say I'm not busy. I am. Incredibly. I work all day and then there is no break, no commute, no...

Paw Patrol and conveniently not over-lapping meetings is what got us through the morning today. I am looking forward to being able to use grandparents as childcare again next week because this has been trying. It's hard to be a good mom when I'm also trying to be a good teacher and vice versa. I know how lucky I am to have any help at all right now. I can't imagine how difficult it is for the people who don't have family that they can trust to isolate and help with their kids, or those who don't have the opportunity to isolate. Just another one of those pandemic things where it's hard but it could be harder but that also doesn't mean that it's not hard... if that makes sense? Everything feels so complex today. Yesterday Folk Fest was cancelled, also Stampede, but FF is the significant thing in my life. I'm just sad about it. That's all.

Everclear was the choice this morning. I must admit this is streaming from Apple Music and not my vinyl collection though. I don't really want to talk about anything today. I'm tired from a busy day of classes and one-on-one student meetings and marking and emails. But this is a good thing, I like being busy with work (just not overwhelmed). What I do want to mention though is that the UK, Germany, and Australia are all set to start testing a vaccine on human subjects. Fingers, toes, everything is crossed that one is successful. I know we're still more than a year away but the sooner this can get off the ground the better. Brief, but good today. And so so so so grateful for the return of the sun.

We've had to re-quarantine some grandparents due to a (totally normal and not concerning) hospital visit. So just to be safe we have a tiny coworker at home this week. This meant that my only hope of getting some work done this morning was to forego my usual vinyl selections and set her up with some cheerios, milk, 2 different types of water cups, and a movie. Plus all of her toys and books and the cushions off the couch, and also a basket of her shoes. Entertaining a 16 month old is hard enough, trying to do it while also navigating a full time job at home is impossible. The nice thing about today's schedule is that nap time perfectly lined up with my prep so I had the chance to send some longer emails and make some phone calls - the things that are near impossible to do when she's awake. This is where it's been really helpful to have dedicated that time last week to being prepared. I have D2L announcements ready to go, checklists for daily tasks and on-going jobs. ...

After a weekend of Disney singalong and Global Citizen concerts on TV (and paw patrol, always paw patrol), a little Adele was the musical palate cleanser that I needed. If we're being honest I put this record on specifically for Send My Love but I was surprised by how relatable Million Years Ago is right now.   Sometimes I just feel it's only me Who can't stand the reflection that they see I wish I could live a little more Look up to the sky, not just the floor I feel like my life is flashing by And all I can do is watch and cry I miss the air, I miss my friends I miss my mother, I miss it when Life was a party to be thrown But that was a million years ago The warm weather is such a welcome change. It came in this weekend in the most Calgary way possible, winter, -10, and snow one day, blue skies, +10, and sun the next and it seems as though it's here to stay. We spent a lot of time outside, finally taking down the big Christmas bobbles on our t...

Steph is one of my very best friends. I've known her as long as I can remember, she was in my wedding party, we went to every level of school together. She is hands down the smartest person I know and has spent the last 14 years living in Montreal and studying at McGill. She's worked towards a PhD which she recently earned from home due to COVID. Here's what she's been experiencing:  Covid-19 in Quebec Date Quebec Montreal (in addition to everything Quebec) March 11 Announces 14day self isolation for returning travelers March 12 Bans indoor gatherings of more than 250 people. Anyone with flu-like symptoms must self quarantine for 14 days March 13 All School suspended for 2 weeks. Remote learning commenced on March 30 th . Public day care also closed. All public buildings are closed (arenas, libraries, sport facilities, etc.), large public events cancelled (saint Patrick’s day parade, Montreal symphony orchestra) March 14 Visits to h...

Throwing it back to 5 years before I was born with a little Culture Club this morning. My dad gave me a cassette version of this album for my first walkman when I was like 5 and I listened to it so much that the tape stretched out. Though, I realized while listening to the vinyl version this morning that I only listened to side A... over and over and over again. I'm finding that mornings are my favourite part of the day right now. I get to sleep in a little bit, actually make a breakfast AND eat it, drink tea while it's warm and fresh. I get ready for work, hair and a little makeup if I have a video class or meeting, otherwise it's just opening blinds, putting on some music, and organizing my work space for the day. It's slow, there's no stress, I love it. Evenings are different though. They feel lonely and long. I miss family dinners, I miss having my daughter run to me at daycare pickup, I miss feeling like that couple of hours between her bed time and my b...

Mumford and Sons released a collaboration with Baaba Maal a few years ago. Just a short EP, it blends their English alt-Folk style with Baaba Maal's Sengalese rhythms. It is unreal how good these 5 songs are. This album sounds like sunshine. I walked down the aisle to There Will be Time at our wedding. This music is a part of me. So a good choice for starting the day. Today was a grocery day. Prescriptions to be filled, food to be restocked. We've been ordering Chef's Plate, a meal kit delivery service. It's kind of reignited my love of cooking because somebody else does the planning, I just have to execute. It helps that I'm at home and don't have to choose between time with my daughter and time in the kitchen now. Anyways, these kits have really reduced our need to go shopping, we just need to stock up on milk and bananas mostly. Today though, a freezer restocking trip. It was announced yesterday that due to factory closures we will likely see a seve...

Fleetwood Mac is who I chose to start my workday with. Rumours is a classic album and one that I often go back to. I'd highly recommend it for driving the highway between Lethbridge and Nobleford as I did regularly for work when I lived in the Southern part of our province. I find myself wanting to just hop into the car and drive south to Lethbridge for a day. For no reason, maybe stop into my favourite cafe or visit the park in the coulees. I haven't really had this desire for years. I miss University and I miss the small community I had when I lived there - but I think right now I miss the freedom of that time of my life. I don't think I miss Lethbridge, I think I miss what Lethbridge represents. But if I'm being real, I would do terrible things for a curried tuna melt, pasta salad, and London Fog from the Penny. In my course yesterday we discussed the concept of grief during the pandemic. Something I've talked about on here previously. What I learned from t...

Today is a PD day. I love PD days. For real. I like talking about my work, my kids, their work, my discipline, anything that has to do with my job. So I really value the opportunities presented by PD - especially when it's conversational. Today, I attended an online session about maintaining connections with students through this crisis. It was great - super helpful, gave me some good activity ideas, and gave me some energy and inspiration to get through a few hours of task design. This was a good start to the week after a long weekend. I'm choosing to ignore that it was Easter this weekend. We're not religious so the significance of the holiday in our lives is just time spent with family. I would have loved to go to my parent's house for a big easter dinner and a little too much chocolate. We would have brought home leftovers that I would be eating for lunch all week and it would have been a nice day spent with family. Instead, we stayed home. We still have lef...

If U2's Where the Streets Have No Name isn't your pandemic jam you should revaluate some choices you're making. " I want to run, I want to hide I want to tear down the walls that hold me inside I wanna reach out and touch the flame Where the streets have no name I want to feel sunlight on my face I see that dust cloud disappear without a trace I wanna take shelter from the poison rain Where the streets have no name, oh oh" Perfectly sums up how I'm feeling being cooped up in my house today. We have surpassed 1.5 million cases globally. Numbers were released yesterday which suggest that up to 800 000 Albertans could become infected by the end of this. It's not getting any better yet which is frustrating, scary, disappointing, but also expected. The weather is finally turning to spring which is great and means we can spend more time outside, but is also terrifying because it means everyone else will be spending more time outside too. Everything i...

It's not an album title. I woke up with a blinding migraine this morning. The type where the pressure builds up and it feels like your eyeballs are about to burst. So I wrote out some lesson plans, booked a sick day, and went back to bed. I'm worried what we will do if someone in the house gets COVID. Just a morning of me being out of commission made things difficult. My husband had to drop our daughter off with my parents for the day which is usually my job because his work day starts earlier than mine does. None of the dishes have been put away, the kitchen is a mess, the dog hasn't been walked. So what happens if we're both sick and can't rely on grandparents for childcare? Who takes care of the kid - the house - the dog? This is my new worry.

The Strumbellas have amazing cover art on all of their albums but We Still Move on Dance Floors is far and away my favourite. This band is another Folk Fest discovery for me but rather than taking me pack to Prince's Island this album is winding mountain roads and a summer road trip to my best friend's family cabin with my boyfriend (now husband) and our small new puppy (now giant dog), Juno. Nostalgia is weird these days. I'm longing for a previous time where we were a little less scared and a lot more free... but it was a month ago. It's wild to me how fast everything has changed. Alberta confirmed just 25 new cases today. This is a sharp decrease (98 yesterday). It could be nothing, just a statistical anomaly. But it could be the start of the flattening. I’m holding out hope for the later but will wait for more information. I want to focus on the positives today. I am so grateful for the extra minutes in the day to spend with my little family. So, so, ...

This morning I chose to listen to a time machine. As soon as the needle touched on and the record started spinning I was transported back to summer 2018. I'm at the Calgary Folk Fest, sitting on the little hill at stage 4, partly in the shade of the trees but also still bathed in sunlight. Drinking one of those shaken lemonades and eating kettle corn all while being serenaded by this musician I've never heard of before called AHI. And he is good. Like really good. There's something so compelling about his lyrics, they're personal yet universal. He sings about his own family and you feel like you are a part of it. He sings about his earlier life and you, somehow, were there too. I bought In Our Time on vinyl about a month after the Folk Fest when I saw him in Vancouver. We took a short trip out after our wedding that August and my husband surprised me with tickets to see AHI open for Michael Franti (another favourite artist of mine) at the Commodore Ballroom. This ...

Anyone who knows anything about me knows of my affinity for the Arkells. I have seen them in concert (I miss concerts!) something like 10 times, I own all their albums. I even have a friend who occasionally plays in their horn section (she's the coolest person I know). So, because my day started in a funk I chose my favourite Arkells album to kick things off for my work day. Unfortunately, I didn't make such a stellar choice with my early morning listening. Today was my daycare (actually my parent's house) drop-off day and on the commute I decided to listen to This American Life, one of my favourite podcasts. The episode this week centred around 4 stories of Coronavirus experiences and they were devastating, to say the least. It's been on my mind ever since and has really brought my biggest fears to the forefront, the ones I've successfully pushed away for the last few days. I'm going to give myself some time, at the end of my work day, to sit in those feeling...

Today I decided to start by dipping back into my childhood with a little Eve 6. My brother got the Horrorscope album for his 9th or 10th birthday and it quickly became a pre-sports staple for both of us. This was, of course, back in the days of discmans (dicmen?) and when our parent's new Saturn seemed super cool because it had a CD player in it. I ordered the vinyl version for him for Christmas a few years ago and couldn't resist getting one for myself as well. As a woman I wear many hats throughout my day; mother, wife, daughter, sister, niece, cousin, friend, teacher, counsellor, first aid provider, cook, cleaner, dog walker, Netflix doc-series binge watcher. Today I had the opportunity to add a new title to the list - hairdresser. My husband decided it was time for an at-home haircut. It was stressful, messy, awful, but he came out looking ok. I honestly never thought I would be doing this and hope that I never have to again. I can. not. wait. for the day that he can go b...

First day of school jitters are a very real thing. Especially for teachers. Especially when it's your first day of classes online, from home, in your kitchen, when you maybe didn't do all of the dishes last night and don't have time for them this morning. That kind of weird energy is best accompanied by a Taylor Swift dance party so today I dusted off 1989 for the it's turn on the record player. It turned out to be the perfect choice. You can listen to this one to get into my musical head space for the rest of the post. Classes went well??!!!?? I think. I feel good about it. We talked about some important online learning things, went over the schedule and expectations, and then dove right into the Treaty of Versailles and League of Nations. Gotta set the stage for the rise of Hitler. The virtual classroom is great, albeit somewhat awkward. I can get through an entire lesson without being interrupted or losing my train of thought but the kids, predictably, do...

Nothing hugely new to report from Texas, besides the fact that we're under a shelter-in-place until April 9th (unless extended). So far San Antonio, Austin, Dallas, Waco and some other smaller municipalities have done it too but the list of 'essential services' has me shaking my head sometimes. Apparently the car wash place down the road is considered essential? That being said, I feel a lot better about how our mayor and county judge are handling the crisis, slightly less so about our governor but I'm so pleased that Texas is handling it better than the federal government or even some other states. According to the national news, Trump believes this will all be over and we can 'go back to normal' by Easter - April 12 - and he wants to see everyone in church. I think this is ridiculous and irresponsible to encourage that because there will always be some people who listen and that lack of social distancing is only going to prolong the crisis. As of a few days a...

I hate making titles for these blog posts. Knowing that 3 people might read the ridiculous heading I choose makes me anxious. I'm solving this problem through my new working at home opportunity - becoming reacquainted with my Vinyl collection. At work I usually walk up the 3 flights of stairs, unlock my classroom, put my stuff down, and then the very first thing I do is turn on my bluetooth speaker and pick out some tunes for the morning. It helps me to focus. So in my new office (still my kitchen table) I've decided to pick out a record to enjoy for the day as a part of my new getting to work routine. Today is Let's Be Still by the Head and the Heart. It pairs well with my Alpine Punch rooibos from David's Tea and the French Revolution papers I've been marking. It felt fitting for our current circumstances. The biggest change I am feeling right now is not being at home - that's not unusual. I did this for 14 months and have actually only been back to ...

I need brain breaks. This is something I've known about myself forever. I can focus and get my work done and do a good job as long as I can also get up and move around for a couple of minutes. So, at work this usually looks like me going down to the water bottle filling fountain by the main office, or running down to the basement to ask an English teacher a quick question instead of sending an email, or having to go to the second floor to get the laptops that I booked, or leaving the classroom for a couple of minutes to check with groups working in breakout spaces. At home it's more like a 5 minute break after a meeting to put some laundry away, a quick tidy up of the toys in the living room, running the compost bin out to the back alley because I'm working in the kitchen and have become acutely aware of the scent of decomposing banana peel from yesterday's breakfast.  This is making it significantly harder to close the activity rings on my apple watch BUT my house wi...

Jack is the kind of friend that’s like family. We grew up together and they have always been a significant person in my life. They are currently living in Montreal and working the front lines by supporting vulnerable and at risk populations. This is a Facebook post that they shared recently with the full disclaimer that this is all other people’s information and ideas, just being shared to be helpful. “a few things i’ve learned in the last couple of days in various zoom calls (they were recorded so i’ll post links in the comments if i can) that made me feel better and might make you feel better too: - the primary way this virus spreads is touching something that has the virus on it and then touching your face. it isn’t airborne— it’s in droplets of spit (this is why you need to keep 2m of distance between you and other people if you go out— to avoid transmission by breathing in droplets they’ve coughed out). if you wash your hands whenever you touch things (from) outside your ...